This will be an extremely spoilerish post about Umineko Episode 3, Banquet of the Golden Witch. It contains my thoughts about the story, as I proceeded through it, done in a twitter-like style. Anyways it was a really great arc. Really great arc. Don’t read if you don’t want to get spoiled…. though it’s pretty unlikely you will understand my ramblings unless you’ve read through the episode yourself already.
>>Oh Battler you lucky sonnafabitch! Getting toyed around as much as you like by the Seven Stakes! “Oh no Beatrice-sama he broke again! Fix him! Fix him!”
>>Hey Eva hates cigarettes. Starting to like her a bit now.
>>FFFFFFFFFFFF Battler gets reversed trolled back with Hempel’s Raven. God damn those logic theories.
>>Battler attempts to reverse reverse troll Beato… but FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF RED TEXT SHIIIIIIT
>>LOOOOOL FUCK YEAH BATTLER REVERSE TROLLING SUCCESS!
>>Opening salvo: Battler 1 – 0 Beatrice.
>>Beato was once human? Oh wow. Man why is she sometimes so moe-moe?!
>>Oh god Battler and Ronove hitting it on. And to think that Daisuke Ono and Sugita Tomokazu are playing them respectively. Fuck it’s feels like a reverse Koizumi here!
>>Oh dear playing with them ass nee-chan’s sure is deadly.
>>There are no more than 18 people on Rokkenjima. Oh shit, Beato takes the offensive!
>>Oh finally it’s the second day. Let the blood flow!
>>The Seven Sisters sure are entertaining…. poor arrogant Lucifer lolololol.
>>Oh shiiiiiiii…….. wtf KUMASAWA IS WHAT IS THIS I DON’T EVEN.
>>holy shit epic magic battle
>>Oh nooooo Beato won. Poor Battler left with his mouth hanging wide open.
>>Poor Battler~ crying and hiding under the table~ coz he can’t argue back~
>>Rokkenjima = Giant Schrodinger’s cat experiment huh.
>>Eva found the gold! But the answer to the epitaph wasn’t revealed!
>>щ(ﾟДﾟщ) Battler slapped Beato!
>>Awww Beato’s hurt that Battler slapped her （ ´_ゝ｀）
>>Awww Beato’s sad that Battler doesn’t want to see her face at all （ ´_ゝ｀）
>>Whoa fuck, epic showdowns between Belphegor vs Rudolf and Leviathan vs Kyrie. Holy shit Kyrie is scary.
>>Σ(ﾟДﾟ ) OMG the Siestas’ are scary. And a little cool too.
>>George’s ‘Tomitake Flash’ t-shirt sure ruins the poignant mood of his sadness.
>>Oh god, Beato sacrificing herself to protect Jessica and Kanon-kun’s final meeting!!! MANLY TEARS WERE SHED.
>>FUCK YEAH BATTLER, BEAT THAT BITCH DOWN WITH YOUR LOGIC!
>>OH FUCK WALLS AND WALLS OF RED TEXT FFFFFFFFFF. Damn you Evatrice you bitch!
>>WITCHES DON’T RE-FORM☆ *cackle*cackle*cackle*cackle* omg wtf bbq pwned :trollface: :trollface: :trollface: :trollface: :trollface:
>>I fucking got played. I FUCKING GOT PLAYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEED!!!!!!! i feel so dirty right now ｡･ﾟ(ノД`)ﾟ・。 ｡･ﾟ(ノД`)ﾟ・。 ｡･ﾟ(ノД`)ﾟ・。
>>Tea Party Time: LOOOL Lord Santa Claus.
>>Tea Party Time: OH SHI— Lambda means serious business from now on. Wow she sure has a grudge on Bern.
>>????: Hurr Poor Ange.
TL;DR Witches don’t re-form☆ *cackle*cackle*cackle*cackle*cackle*cackle*
MAGNIFICENTLY PLAYED BEATO ｡･ﾟ(ノД`)ﾟ・。 ｡･ﾟ(ノД`)ﾟ・。 ｡･ﾟ(ノД`)ﾟ・。｡･ﾟ(ノД`)ﾟ・。 ｡･ﾟ(ノД`)ﾟ・。 ｡･ﾟ(ノД`)ﾟ・。｡･ﾟ(ノД`)ﾟ・。 ｡･ﾟ(ノД`)ﾟ・。 ｡･ﾟ(ノД`)ﾟ・。